I found this list of things STUPID PEOPLE ACTUALLY PUT ON THEIR RESUMES (just so you know, I don't think most of it are stupid, it's just flawed.Haha)....and I couldn't stop laughing from the first one to the last. Hilarious! Click on the link above to view the complete list.
Oh, and by the way, here are my favorites. :)
2. My intensity and focus are at inordinately high levels, and my ability to complete projects on time is unspeakable.
11. Insufficient writing skills, thought processes have slowed down some. If I am not one of the best, I will look for another opportunity.
18. Experience: Watered, groomed, and fed the family dog for years.
22. Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer.
30. Personal Goal: To hand-build a classic cottage from the ground up using my father-in-law.
31. Objective: I want a base salary of $50-$60,000 dollars, not including bonus. And some decent benefits. Like a retirement plan, health insurance, personal or sick days. (Dream on!!!!)
44. I have recently sold my home and I now live in a large RV so I will be able to relocate quickly.
47. Personal achievements: Successfully played “Chop Sticks” on a toy piano with my big toes.
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